Lifeline for Julia

As the Prime Minister’s recent appearance on Four Corners demonstrates, her judgment and her grating brand of double-speak remain serious impediments to the restoration of her fortunes.

Let us not forget the recovery of Gillard’s confidence and demeanour – and standing in the opinion polls – with the visits to Australia by the Queen in October last year and United States President Barack Obama in November and a rare run of political wins. But come December her political judgment again came into question with her ham-fisted cabinet reshuffle in which the primary aim of some questionable appointments was to reward the architects of her coup.

So what would it take to save Julia Gillard’s prime ministership – and in the process restore dignity to the office? Barring a successful leadership challenge, Gillard has a good 18 months to put things right. She should go for broke in using that time to restore her good name and the quality of Australian democracy.

Prime Minister, from me to you, here are some helpful tips you may wish to consider:

1) Sack your staff

Who are the nitwits who advise Gillard? I know it can’t be my teenaged kids because I see them off to school every morning. But by all accounts her advisers are not much older, even if not as bright. For goodness sake, let’s draw the era of the Young Turks to a close. Get some substance, experience and wisdom into your private office.

2) Give Don Watson a call

I listened to your supposedly agenda-setting headland speech on “the new Australian economy” at the Australia-Israel Chamber of Commerce lunch in Melbourne on February 1. As I read through the transcript while you delivered the speech I could not help but reflect on how pedestrian it was. Where was the speechcraft for what was supposed to be a defining speech? I’ve no idea who is writing your speeches at the moment, but you should swallow your pride, give the maestro Don Watson a call and beg for his help.

3) Reshuffle the Ministry – but this time do it properly

Any cabinet that has Mark Arbib in the bizarre dual portfolio of Assistant Treasurer and Sports Minister is not one that has been chosen with attention to merit or relevance. Whatever Labor’s woes at the moment, there is pound for pound more talent on the government benches than on the other side of the House. Forget favours, forget the numbers. As things stand at the moment, electorally you are on a hiding to nothing, so why not have the best possible ministry at your disposal.

4) Confront Kevin Rudd

We know you’re not shy when it comes to eye-balling Kevin Rudd. It’s time the two of you got together again and thrashed out your differences. Of course he still wants to be Prime Minister, but you both have to be grown up and sort this out. Get some face to face conversations going, get some understandings and commitments on the table, and the two of you just get on with it.

5) Tell us what you believe

Australians don’t know what you believe in, and who can blame them? The Australia-Israel Chamber of Commerce speech was not as important or defining as it was portrayed. It was neither here nor there. Yes the economy is changing, yes change is a constant, yes we’d better get used to it. That speech could have been delivered 10 or 20 years ago. We need a manifesto. What do you believe in? What’s your vision for Australia? What positive difference is your government going to make to the people of Australia and to future generations.

6) Set goals and stand by them

Declare to the people of Australia what you intend to achieve by the time of the next election and be prepared to be judged on your performance.

7) Get a makeover

Before you go on about this being sexist, it simply isn’t true. The appearance of our leaders is not the defining characteristic by which they will or should be judged, but of course it matters. And of course it’s something we talk about – and it has nothing to do with gender. Recall our fascination with Paul Keating’s Italian suits and his sense of personal style and how he single-handedly improved the sartorial standards of almost the entire parliament in the 1980s and 90s. Remember John Howard and those daggy track suits? And let us not pretend that Kim Beazley’s weight was not a political issue. Julia, appearance matters. At the moment you look as if you are dressed by Krusty the Clown’s tailor. As the now infamous Four Corners episode reminded us the other night, as Deputy Prime Minister you looked every inch the Prime Minister you were about to become.

Make it so again.

8) Give the Greens their marching orders

Bob Brown and his Greens have done you no favours; nor the nation for that matter. Let them conduct their relationship with you on the floors of Parliament on the basis of the quality of your government, not according to some sordid marriage of convenience.

9) Restore the independence and integrity of the public service

The politicisation of the public service has been to the detriment of Australian democracy. Public servants believe it is no longer their job to give frank and fearless advice, but to make you look good, or at the very least to keep you out of trouble. In the process, they are especially mindful of keeping themselves out of trouble. You didn’t start this trend, but you can put an end to it.

That’s enough for now. See how you go. You may not win the 2013 election, but at least you will have earned your place in history for all the right reasons. And besides, as unpopular as you may be at the moment, my guess is that most Australians dearly want you to make the biggest comeback since Lazarus. As you know, that’s not an unknown phenomenon in Canberra.

Kevin Rudd is certainly banking on it.

Do you agree? Write and tell me your views.

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